Kmflett's Blog

The aristocracy are not the farmers who work the land…but are the mere consumers of the rent

E P Thompson, The Making of the English Working Class (1963)

Boris Johnson did a round of interviews for the French media on 18th November to promote the French edition of his ‘memoir’ Unleashed. Johnson can speak French but the delivery was of the same standard as his English. Shall we say sub-Churchillian.

The French title is Indomptable which roughly translates as Unhinged. This might be good sales hook in France given Johnson’s Brexit reputation

Drawn cricket Tests & Bazball a dialectical relationship?

The cricket year is not yet at end. The Australia v India Test series starts on Friday (2.20am in the UK) and New Zealand v England is next week.

However Steve James (Times 19^th November) has written an interesting stat focused survey of what is happening in cricket Test wise across the world.

2024 so far has seen just one drawn Test, between the West Indies and South Africa in August. That is an historic low.

Bazball may be the culprit or hero depending on your view. England under McCullum play to win (or more recently lose) rather than draw. The idea is to bring the pace and excitement of short form cricket into Tests.

Of course better pitch preparation and better drainage reducing rain delays have also helped but it means that five day Tests have become less common.

Personally and Ive been watching the cricket since the 1960s I think a hard fought draw can show cricket at its best, as a battle between bat and ball where neither quite prevails.

What I don’t like are one sided victories (even if the team I’m supporting wins) and runfests where huge first innings scores see a result achieved via short form methods in the second.

Of course there are wider issues. Firstly in many countries, the audience in person is not there for Tests and staging them is costly. Secondly we are talking men here. There should be a lot more Test Matches in the women’s game.

Suella Braverman was sacked for a second time as Home Secretary a year ago this month after she tried to get a Palestinian demonstration in central London banned, attacked the Met Police, and encouraged drunken fascists to have a punch up at the Cenotaph.

Braverman’s second spell as Home Secretary had focused a lot on finding ways to curtail and ban the right to protest. Its her legislative work that has led to jail sentences for Just Stop Oil protesters for example.

However Ms Braverman has now established the principle of two tier protests. Those she wants banned and those she supports.

The farmers protest in central London on 19th November fell into the second category. It was modestly disruptive as protests need to be to make an impact which it certainly did. As often with large scale protests the character was mixed. On the one hand there were tenant farmers who are being done over by big agriculture. On the other was Jeremy Clarkson who now denies he bought his farm as a tax dodge and says he did so because he wanted to shoot pheasants or possibly peasants.

That notwithstanding in a democratic protest there should be a right to protest and a recognition that civil disobedience can be legitimate (see tractors). No tiers are required to establish this principle

Beard Liberation Front

3rd January

Hirsute urged to act to avoid frozen follicles

The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has issued updated guidelines to beard wearers after many areas of the UK are set to have snowy and icy conditions.

The BLF says that while beards have been protecting against cold weather since 1854 it is also important to protect the beard itself against snow and ice penetration.

One way to do this may simply be to remain indoors and away from all possible contact with snow and ice.

However this is not possible for all including many workers and those who venture out for essential reasons.

When venturing out in the ice and snow, the following guidelines for beard wearers are advised-

Snow and Ice Guidelines for Beard Wearers

1] Protect the entire beard with a scarf or roll neck jumper. If snow is heavy a snood is advised.

2] Sweep any drifting snow from the beard on a regular basis. Do not allow snow to accumulate in the beard under any circumstances.

3] Comb the beard through regularly to remove any residual snow

4] If the beard becomes chilled or frozen due to snowy or icy weather it is essential to thaw it out slowly.

5] When temperatures drop below zero freezing follicles can be a significant issue

6] If follicles do freeze or develop icicles these should be thawed slowly but as quickly as possible

7] Dry the beard slowly in a warm room and check for any damaged hairs and follicles

BLF Organiser Keith Flett said snow or ice in the beard can cause serious damage to hairs and follicles and the hirsute are urged to make sure they are protected before venturing out in snowy weather. If snow does accumulate in the beard or follicles become frozen it is essential to follow the BLF guidelines to prevent serious damage. In particular if the beard suffers from icing, gradual thawing following the guidelines is equally important to avoid damage.

World Toilet Day: once again on toilets

Its World Toilet Day which has a focus on inadequate sanitation facilities in many parts of the globe. In the UK, the TUC and others are campaigning on a lack of access to toilets at work, particularly for those many who do jobs which require them to be out and about.

Toilets are a vanishing part of British public life. As someone in their late 60s I find I need to visit one quite frequently (partly due to medication) and that means planning where I can visit one when I go out.

It is of course part of the privatisation of the public domain. After all, where is the profit in toilets? In a varied career I was once a building facilities manager and that included responsibility for bogs and basins. In a workplace they are essential.

Toilets get blocked, need cleaning and leak. All this costs money to sort out. The unfortunate reality is that however marvellous a refurbished toilet (at some expense) looks it remains just that- a toilet. Clearly there are more interesting and profitable things to invest money in.

I don’t expect much in the way of even modest reforms from a Starmer Government but given he is now 60 and must need to pay a visit from time to time, perhaps the public toilet issue could be addressed

The Ambridge Socialist

19^th November

Protests: Just say NO to Clarkson. The Grundy’s must inherit Ambridge

The BBC doesn’t report much about the political life of Ambridge, but once again farming ‘protests’ are planned. For those who recall the New Labour years think, in some cases, far right activists (in this case a Youtube influencer and alleged farmer) giving up on the Tories defending their interests.

The NFU makes a distinction between those who brought land as a tax dodge- Jeremy Clarkson freely admitted he did- and those whose actual full time occupation is farming.

The Ambridge Socialist has spotted Justin Elliott and Brian Aldridge on today’s London protests. The former is only involved in farming for commercial gain and does no farming. The latter is a farmer who has far has can be seen would not be impacted by proposed changes to inheritance tax. Neither however like any form of Labour Government which is what today’s protests are about.

Ambridge Socialist Editor Keith Flett said, you won’t find the Grundys protesting today. They will never have to pay inheritance tax but they should be the inheritors of the land not the Archers

In search of the Woke sandwich

Bread maker Allison have released the results of a survey they commissioned in to who eats what in a sandwich. This caught the interest of the Daily Mail and to make the interest of some readers was attacted too a sub-editor inserted the word ‘Woke’ into the headline.

The survey was not about that at all but focused mostly in generational differences in sandwich fillings. In fact those who are getting on a bit (hello there) and those who are at the moment youthful were united in agreeing that sandwiches are a good thing.

It appears that younger people are not so keen on mustard in a ham sandwich but conversely like ‘hot; fillings such as chillies.

Boomers like cheddar and onion sandwiches  whereas it appears Gen Z prefer other cheeses. One thinks of a brie, bacon and chilli jam sandwich- a supermarket regular. The Mail mentions ‘continental cheeses’ but it really must keep in mind that Churchill’s favourite cheese was Gruyere.

Like avocado and chicken/bacon is a supermarket staple.

In short ‘woke’ doesn’t work. Try checking for what makes a beard friendly sandwich.

Gen Z Brits are turning their backs on British sandwich classics like ham and mustard and cheese and onion in favour of ‘fancy’ fillings like avocado, olives and continental cheese.

Another growing sandwich trend is for fancy fillings like avocado, peppers, chillies and olives, with a third (35%) of Gen Z opting for upmarket extras over just one in 10 (10%) boomers.

Boomers instead prefer onion in their sandwiches, with three in 10 (29%) regularly sliding slices of red, white or spring onion inside compared to just 12% of Gen Z.

Former Brewdog boss James Watt has posted on his LinkedIn account on his support for Elon Musk

Elon Musk is now heading up government efficiency in the U.S.

And I think this is an absolutely brilliant move.

Every single business owner out there knows that.

It may be a sign that Watt is Yesterday’s Man that the only media coverage his statement seems to have got is in the Sunday Times Business Section Diary Column (where I saw it- its good on business beards).

Watt later complained again on LinkedIn that the ST had underestimated the interest his post had got.

Elon Musk and Punk don’t seem an obvious fit. The link may be with Watt’s partner Georgia Toffolo. She previously worked for Nigel Farage and of course Farage thinks he is Donald Trump’s envoy to the UK.

Watt concluded his original post by suggesting that Keir Starmer should appoint him to run a UK version of the Dept of Government Efficiency. An examination of Watt’s record at Brewdog suggests that he would do at least as well in the role as Musk is likely to do in the US.

In the meantime whoever is currently running Brewdog’s PR might do well to issue a statement underlining that Watt is no longer running things.

From December 2nd Discovery+ (Warners) is running a series of programmes about Jacob Rees Mogg his wife Helena Beatrix Wentworth Fitzwilliam de Chair & their six children. Its filmed at their Somerset mansion and their Westminster Town House.

The Sunday Times (17th Nov) ran an extended promo for the series which I’ve read so you don’t have to.

As ever the devil is in the detail. Rees Mogg drinks instant coffee and the Sunday meal of roast beef, roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding and parsnips (served by the servants) comes with a Pescatarian alternative of fish cakes that sounds Woke.

In addition the tomato sauce comes in a ramekin which as the ST notes is parsimonious