Articles

Ho Ho Ho: Campaign for Real Santas 2019 launches

In Uncategorized on November 26, 2019 by kmflett

CAMPAIGN FOR REAL SANTAS

Organised by the Beard Liberation Front

Press release 26th November

Contact Keith Flett 07803 167266

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Ho Ho Ho: CAMPAIGN FOR REAL SANTAS 2019 LAUNCHES

The Campaign for Real Santas, which promotes Santas with genuine organic beards, has launched its 2019 initiative to promote real Santas with genuine beards by warning people to be aware of absurd false bearded Santas as the busiest pre-Christmas shopping weekends get underway.

The Campaigners say that with unemployment and under-employment amongst mature men over 50, there is absolutely no reason for anyone to use an assistant Santa who does not have a real beard.

At the same time the Campaign is also keen to encourage more female Santas with organic knitted beards.

Campaigners are urging parents and children to vigorously tug the beards of Santas they encounter as a definitive test as to whether they are in the presence of a real Santa or not.

CFRS organiser Keith Flett said, we are launching the campaign early again this year but the reason is hopefully obvious to most. Christmas decorations and lights are up in main High Streets and Christmas tat is everywhere. Our task of exposing false bearded Santas is more important than ever.

THREE STEPS TO SPOT A GENUINE SANTA

1 Tug the beard of the Santa. If it comes away, then the Santa is FAKE

2 If the beard remains intact tug the beard of the Santa again. If the Santa swears then they are genuine. If they simply repeat a ‘ho ho ho’ mantra they are FAKE

3 The Campaign for Real Santas says that genuine Santas must have just the right mix of bonhomie and grumpiness and a real organic beard.

Notes

The Organic Santa of 2019 will be named on December 18th

The Campaign for Real Santas is organised by the Beard Liberation Front

 

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