Kmflett's Blog

Teach Yourself Boris Johnson. 2020 Lockdown edition

Here is a brief guide to Johnson’s English

Cripes: I’ve been found out again

I Say: precursor to Johnson ‘bon mot’

Bullingdon: code for a fine British institution

Damn: see Cripes

Bother: see Damn and Cripes

My friends: see Bullingdon

Blurt: routine Johnson saying

Wiff-Waff: made up term

Piccaninnies: see watermelon smiles

Watermelon smiles: people* want me to speak as I find

Business: F*ck

Herd Immunity: follow the science

Cocaine: see change the subject

Wine: see Dean Martin

Dean Martin: Little Ole Wine Drinker Me

World View: ‘I believe in spreading peace & love’+

Stay Safe: Refers to FTSE 100 share index

Lockdown: for the few not the many

Furlough: see Cheltenham

Cheltenham: see Business

On Your Bike: see Norman Tebbit

Norman Tebbit: ‘Boris Johnson is back in charge (Telegraph 27.4.20)

*people=racists

+letter to Toby Young, July 2005