Beard Liberation Front
6th June
Campaigners offer Jacob Rees Mogg advice on how to safely grow a beard
The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has offered advice to Leader of the Commons Jacob Rees Mogg on how to safely grow a beard.
The advice comes after Rees Mogg told The Times Diary that ‘I have never been brave enough to grow a beard’.
He did however agree that he has an excellent role model,his great-great grandfather the Rev Henry Stiles Savory
BLF Organiser Keith Flett said, beards add gravitas and that surely can never be a bad thing in a politician
Six Steps to safely growing a beard
1 Do not shave and recycle all shaving equipment immediately
2 Allow facial hair to develop over a 7-10 day period
3 Wash the facial hair at least twice every day and purge any split ends
4 An organic beard grows naturally so do not trim at this stage
5 After 10 days judicious and occasional trimming may be employed. There is a fine balance between a beard that is stylish and one that is genuinely organic
6 Under trimming is better than over trimming. Over trimming may lead to having needlessly to repeat steps 1-5
The Times 6th June 2020
Jacob Rees-Mogg fears that he is turning into the Yeti of the Chew Valley while the barbers are closed. He has some way to go to match the magnificent pilosity of his great-great-grandfather, the Rev Henry Stiles Savory. Keith Flett of the Beard Liberation Front calls on the Mogg to adopt the wild undergrowth of his forebear. “The mark of gravitas in the 19th century was a full beard,” Flett says. The leader of the Commons does not bristle at the suggestion. “I have never been brave enough to grow a beard, but if I were to my ancestor’s style is clearly the one to go for,” the Mogg tells me, adding that one of his literary heroes is Edward Lear’s old man with a beard, whose whiskers housed “two owls and a hen, four larks and a wren”. Imagine getting a facemask over that.
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