The Ambridge Socialist
19th July
Reporting the class struggle in Borsetshire
We’ll applaud Sgt Burns when he arrests Moss & finds the bunting thief
Sgt Harrison Burns went on community radio on Thursday, having been well briefed by media expert Kenton, and painted himself as a tribune of the oppressed. He received a round of village clapping at the end.
Sgt Burns as a tribune of the oppressed seems to the Ambridge Socialist a rather unlikely possibility. When he’s arrested Philip Moss and finally caught the bunting thief we may take another look.
The Bull gets a new peacock
After Kenton murdered the Bull’s previous peacock Jolene has determined to get a new one. Kenton claimed that he had had 175 name suggestions on The Bull’s website for its name. The Ambridge Socialist ran a twitter poll which came out narrowly in favour of Jeremy over Keir…
Flytipping. Inspector David Knacker investigates
It was not of course Sgt Burns who discovered the identity of the person whose rubbish was flytipped and caused damage to the combine harvester* but self-confessed roof murderer David Archer. Archer found an e-mail belonging to Joy who had paid an apparently reputable operative to dispose of the waste. The Ambridge Socialist thinks that Moss is behind this.
*surely time for a new Wurzels song
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