The Ambridge Socialist
13th September
David Archer stands ready as the Tories press on with badger cull
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Tory Minister George Eustice announced an extension to the badger cull in England this week despite a Tory pledge earlier in the year to end the cull of the protected species.
It is thought that badgers may be linked to Bovine-TB, a continuing problem, although specific evidence is lacking. The alternative to culling is to vaccinate badgers against TB, a programme that is proven to work. However Ambridge Socialist readers will be aware of the problem the present Government has with anything to do with vaccinations.
It will give the green light to well known badger murderer David Archer who was apprehended for shooting a badger some years back. The cull has been underway in Gloucestershire and Borsetshire for some while. A mystery is why we don’t hear any news of Archer’s badger murder lust in BBC reports from Ambridge.
Prospero the Peacock provides appropriate and measured response
After Kenton murdered The Bull’s previous peacock (an act which obviously interested neither Sgt Burns or the RSPCA) a new one, Prospero has arrived. It has promptly roamed and was to be found attacking Sergeant Burns this week. Knacker claimed it was because Prospero had been concerned about some peacock feathers but all Ambridge Socialist readers will know the peacock had spotted a class enemy and decided to take direct action. Later on Radio Borechester Susan Carter claimed that peacocks are dangerous. Not as dangerous as police officers though.
Theft from the Village shop
Susan and Tracy, the Inspector Clouseau’s of Ambridge are investigating thefts from the village shop. While the obvious candidates are David Archer and Prospero so far they have managed to put Joy and Gavin in the frame. Gavin is definitely guilty though his numerous crimes are rather more significant than shoplifting.
Who is stealing from the village shop?
In Other News
Lynda and Robert are still trying to sort out their marriage and sex lives. This clearly fascinates a certain cohort of Archers listeners
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