CAMPAIGN FOR REAL SANTAS
Organised by the Beard Liberation Front
Press release 5th December
Contact Keith Flett 07803 167266
CALL FOR FAKE SANTA BEARDS TO BE BANNED ON SAFETY GROUNDS
The Campaign for Real Santas, which promotes Santas with genuine organic beards, has called for fake Santa beards, commonly seen in December, to be banned on safety grounds.
The campaigners say that while there are unsurprisingly no existing scientific studies, there is an obvious danger that ‘Santas’ coughing, spluttering, or sneezing into their false beards could mean that they become carriers of COVID-19 infection.
This is particularly so when fake Santa beards are likely to be worn over lengthy periods without cleaning or washing taking place.
With unemployment and under-employment amongst mature men over 50, there is absolutely no reason for anyone to use an assistant Santa who does not have a real beard.
While the chances of fake Santa beards spreading infection may be relatively small, given the exposure children may have to them, it remains case that a Santa with a fake beard could be a ‘super spreader’ of infection
CFRS organiser Keith Flett said, in calling for fake Santa beards to be banned on safety grounds we want to underline that we are not seeking to ban Santa. Far from it in fact. There are plenty of people with genuine beards, well maintained, clean and safe, to fulfil the role.
THREE STEPS TO SPOT A GENUINE SANTA
1 Ask the virtual Santa to tug their beard. If it comes away, then the Santa is FAKE
2 If the beard remains intact ask the virtual Santa to tug their beard again. If the Santa swears then they are genuine. If they simply repeat a ‘ho ho ho’ mantra they are FAKE
3 The Campaign for Real Santas says that genuine Santas must have just the right mix of bonhomie and grumpiness and a real organic beard.
Notes
The Organic Santa of 2020 will be named on December 18th
The Campaign for Real Santas is organised by the Beard Liberation Front
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