Official Guide to the Beard Friendly Mince Pie

Beard Liberation Front

Press Release 22nd December. Contact Keith Flett 07803 167266

A guide to the beard friendly mince pie 2022

December is the season for mince pie eating, but it can provide particular challenges for the hirsute.

The Beard Liberation Front has identified two key issues:

Icing sugar in the beard: this can have the effect of turning it prematurely white and can be difficult to remove. It may also lead to white beard syndrome and people shouting ‘Oi Santa’ at you.

Pastry flakes and crumbs in the beard: If this occurs it is guaranteed that any pogonophobe within 100 metres will shout ‘oi mate you’ve got the remains of your breakfast/lunch etc in your beard’.

There are several ways of avoiding the issues above:

1] Wear a special mince pie beard snood

2] Focus on eating only beard friendly mince pies. In particular pies where the ratio of filling to pastry lies with the former are likely to be more beard friendly.

3] If time and culinary skills allow you can of course make your own beard friendly mince pies

The Beard Liberation Front continues to research the beard friendly mince pie.

BLF Organiser Keith Flett said, there are some reasonably beard friendly mince pies out there but the hirsute need to choose carefully. For the unwary eater icing sugar and pastry flakes in the beard can be a serious concern